. . . I have an idea for a new TV Game Show - Celebrity Silage Making.
There would be teams of two - one a professional - not necessarily a professional farmer, but probably a professional driver. Maybe Jensen Button - no, he will be too expensive this year - better go with last years man Lewis Hamilton. He would drive the tractor and forage harvester.
The other team member would be a "celebrity" from another field (the usual ex Boy Band/soap star/failed politician - there'll be lots of those about soon!). They will drive the tractor and trailer and attempt to keep in line with the forage harvester, so the grass is blown into the trailer.
Points would be lost for grass that misses, and time penalties for not getting back from tipping the grass in the pit, if the forage harvester has to stand idle.
Heats would be held in flat fields, moving onto steep slopes in the finals.
And we would need some judges that are vaguely connected (but not necessarily qualified) to express an opinion - Bernard Matthews? Margaret Becket (has knowledge of Defra and towing a caravan)?
Of course the final decision would be down to a phone vote - but only from those with a genuine holding number.